How do you become brave?

I wondered after interviewing my good friend Sydney Carlton, Director of Brand at Storyblocks about her work to impact diversity, equity and inclusion across a major industry; stock photo, audio and video.

I wondered again after discussing a DEI issue with our team at work and then watching Dave Chapelle’s “woke meeting” on SNL that night. I wondered while editing a college essay for a friend and on my yoga mat as I tried and failed to do a headstand.

Wondering came full circle as my 5.5yo sat in a tree yesterday, frowning at the ground.

Get me down! I’m scared.

Unicorn 5yo sat next to him, trying to give him tree descent tips and tricks. Already a fearless tree climber, she shrugged at his scared and monkey barred her way down.

You have to be scared to be brave.

said unicorn 5yos Dad.

Acknowledge the fear and do it anyway, remembering that brave doesn’t have to mean jumping out of a tree or setting a big, hairy audacious goal. If you asked Confucius how to become brave he’d likely reply with a question:

How are you living your life on a daily basis?

And if you were to ask James Baldwin and Margaret Mead, they’d likely say the same:

MEAD: It’s what we do this week that matters.
BALDWIN: Exactly.
MEAD: That’s the only thing there is; there isn’t any other time.
BALDWIN: We are responsible —
MEAD: For the future. For the present and the future.
BALDWIN: If we don’t manage the present there will be no future.

Bravery comes from actively choosing every incremental uncomfortable step forward. Navigating a nuanced conversation about race at work, correcting a word or action to educate without proselytizing, seeing things as they are and taking small actions everyday to get a little closer to how we want them to be. Seeking and listening to critique, allowing yourself to be wrong. Showing up on the yoga mat everyday leaning a little further into each stretch because you can, even if you don’t know it.

I think you get good enough at these small moments of bravery that you don’t just step forward, you jump. 5.5yo jumped. So did my coworkers, Sydney, and Dave Chapelle. They jump everyday. Will you?